E V A N G E L I N E ' S G H O S T

RULES AND REGULATIONS PERTAINING TO THE DEAD

1. Singing and whistling are forbidden everywhere except Heaven
2. There is no cutting the line at the Pearly Gates
3. There is no running anywhere
4. All newly dead will immediately report to the line assigned in an orderly manner
5. Those destined for Heaven are not allowed to lord it over those assigned to other destinations
6. Those assigned to Purgatory are forbidden from gloating in front of or near those assigned to Limbo or Hell
7. Descent into Hell is immediate
8. Personal requests are frowned upon
9. Second chances must be approved by a majority of the Collective
10. All bets are off if you lose a case on appeal

RULES AND REGULATIONS PERTAINING TO THE NEWLY-DEAD REMANDED TO THEIR HOME WORLDS

1. Public ectoplasmic emissions are strictly prohibited WARNING: Stress results in excess ectoplasm and should be avoided
2. Time travel is forbidden except for certain circumstances as dictated by the Collective
3. Automatic writing is not allowed without prior approval
4. Telekinesis/psychokinesis is forbidden without prior approval
5. Visual haunting will result in demerits that could undermine your tenure track to Destiny
6. Interference with the living is strictly forbidden
7. Aural haunting will result in demerits that could undermine your tenure track to Destiny
8. A combination of visual/aural haunting will result in prosecution by the Court of Dominions
9. Revealing information to the living that they would not acquire naturally will result in prosecution by the Court of Dominions
10. Repeated requests for special allowances will not be tolerated

THE GOVERNANCE OF THE CELESTIAL HIERARCHY
(a.k.a. the party of the first part)

EXECUTIVE ADMINISTRATION
Seraph—the highest order of angel with the most perfect understanding of the universe

LEGAL DEPARTMENT
Cherub—the record-keepers of divine law

THE DIVINE COURT
Thrones—the adjudicators of divine law

JUSTICE DEPARTMENT
Dominions—the decision makers overseeing the daily workings of the universe and lower angels

SPECIAL WORKS
Virtues—the miracle workers and mentors of the universe who carry out the work of the Dominions

PUBLIC WORKS
Powers—keep the physical laws of the universe working by maintaining the border between Heaven and Earth

SECURITY
Principalities—stand guard over nations and mortals

EDUCATION
Archangels—impart divine teachings to humanity

HEALTH & WELFARE
Guardian Angels—protectors of mortals

THE COLLECTIVE
(a.k.a. the party of the second part)

Tier One
The Celestial Hierarchy
Tier One has veto power and can over-vote other members of the Collective

Tier Two – USS Special Forces
Universal Secret Service; assignments delegated by galaxy, sector, system, and planet/ moon/sun. (i.e. USS.MWG.OA.SS-3 would be the Universal Secret Service’s Milky Way Galaxy branch in the sector of Orion’s Arm, in the Solar System’s third planet – Earth).

Tier Three
The populace of Heaven
A majority of 51 percent of the populace vote rules when not over-voted by Tier One

Tier Four
Souls within one millennia of having completely satisfied past sins
Along with the populace of heaven, Tier Three decisions require a 51 percent majority

Tier Five – Non-Voting
Souls remanded to their home worlds are governed but do not govern

THE DEAD
GRADE LEVELS OF THE NEWLY DEAD, RECENTLY DECEASED, LONG DEAD AND THE ANCIENTS
(a.k.a. the party of the third part)

Level 1—Newly Dead, destined for Heaven

Level 2—Newly Dead, destined for Purgatory

Level 3—Newly Dead, destined for Limbo

Level 4—Newly Dead, destined for Hell

Level 5—Newly Dead, remanded to their home world

Level 6—Recently Deceased, remanded to their home world

Level 7—Long Dead, remanded to their home world

Level 8—Ancients, remanded to their home world

Level 9—Fallen divine beings, on appeal

Level 10—All non-newly dead, destined for Hell

THE THIRTEEN MANIFESTATIONS OF SPIRITS

• • Divine Spirit
• • Apparition
• • Ghost
• • Vapor
• • Wraith
• • Vision
• • Presence
• • Specter
• • Sprite
• • Phantom
• • Imp
• • Poltergeist

Note: Essence, ectoplasm and phantasm are merely byproducts of the Spirit and not the Spirit itself.

GHOULS AND ZOMBIES

Be it known that the undead are prohibited from entry into the Collective. Zombies, vampire and the ghouls that beget them, do not meet the minimum requirement for entry in the Collective, which is possession of one’s soul.

BYLAWS OF CELESTIAL HIERARCHY
(the "Corporation")

I. ANNUAL MEETING
A. A meeting of the Collective will be held annually for the purpose of reassignment of members of the Collective and for the purpose of doing other business as may come before the meeting.

II. SPECIAL MEETING
B. Unless otherwise prescribed by the Celestial Hierarchy, special meetings of the Collective may only be called in the following ways:
i. by a majority of the Collective, or
ii. by the Almighty (a.k.a. the "President" or “Head” ), or
iii. by the Court of the Dominion.
The Court of the Dominion will determine the time of any special tribunal called for by a majority of the Collective, or else all tribunals will be held immediately.

III. PLACE OF MEETING
C. The annual meetings or special meetings of the Collective will be held telepathically unless the Celestial Hierarchy requests the presence of one or all in the Court of the Dominions.

IV. NOTICE OF MEETING
D. The telepathic notice of any meeting will be given at a moment’s notice to each member of the Collective entitled to vote at that meeting. Principalities will issue non- telepathic notice to non-voting members of the Collective.
E. Any action to be taken at any annual or special meeting of the Collective, may be taken without a meeting, without prior notice and without a vote, if telepathic consent or consents, setting forth the action to be taken, is agreed to by the majority.
F. Every consent will bear the special signature of each Collective member.

V. LIMITATION OF LIABILITY
G. TO THE EXTENT LEGALLY PERMITTED UNDER APPLICABLE LAW, NEITHER THE CELESTIAL HIERARCHY NOR THE COLLECTIVE SHALL BE LIABLE TO YOU OR ANY THIRD PARTY FOR ANY INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, EXEMPLARY, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL OR PUNITIVE DAMAGES, INCLUDING ANY LOST PROFIT DAMAGES ARISING FROM YOUR DEATH, EVEN IF THE PARTIES OF THE FIRST AND SECOND PART HAVE BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. NOTWITHSTANDING ANYTHING TO THE CONTRARY CONTAINED HEREIN, THE CELESTIAL HIERARCHY AND/OR THE COLLECTIVE’S LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY DAMAGES ARISING FROM OR RELATED TO ANY CAUSE OF ACTION WHATSOEVER, REGARDLESS OF THE FORM OF THE ACTION, SHALL BE LIMITED TO SPECIAL CONSIDERATION IN LIMBO OR PURGATORY DEPENDING ON THE PARTY OF THE FIRST PART’S BEHAVIOR DURING THE SIX (6) MONTHS IMMEDIATELY PRIOR TO THE CLAIM. NOTHING IN THIS AGREEMENT SHALL OVERRIDE THE CELESTIAL HIERARCHY’S OMNIPOTENCE OR ITS POWER TO DEAL WITH THE INTENTIONAL MISCONDUCT OF ANY ANGELS, SAINTS OR SPIRITS IN ANY WAY IT SEES FIT, FOR THE WRONGFUL DEATH OR PERSONAL INJURY TO A SOUL WHO WAS NOT YET FATED TO MEET HIS MAKER.

VI. FORCE MAJEURE
H. Involved parties hereto shall not be liable for the failure to perform any of its obligations under this Agreement if such failure is caused by any reason beyond its reasonable control including without limitation, any occurrence of any incalculable Satanic act, natural evolution, or spontaneous redevelopment of physical properties.

VII. REMEDIES
J. Any remedies provided herein are non-exclusive.

Reading The Collective Handbook For Everlasting Life constitutes a contract between the newly dead and the Collective.

If any provision of this Contract is held unenforceable, then such provision will be modified to reflect the parties' intention. All remaining provisions of this Contract shall remain in full force and effect.



GLOSSARY

Apparition
An unusual or unexpected sight or phenomenon; a ghostly figure

Aura
An energy field that emanates from a living being

Automatic Writing
Writing produced without conscious intention; telepathic or spiritual in origin

Banshee
Female spirit whose appearance or wailing warns a family that one of them will soon die

Bogey
A specter or phantom

Celestial
Relating to, or suggesting heaven or divinity

Celestial Hierarchy
A traditional hierarchy of angels ranked from lowest to highest into the following nine orders: angels, archangels, principalities, powers, virtues, dominions, thrones, cherubim, and seraphim

Channel
A path along which information passes between worlds or beings

Clairvoyance
The ability to perceive matters beyond the range of ordinary perception

Conjure
To summon a spirit by invocation or incantation

Corporeal
Consisting of or relating to a physical material body

Demon
An evil spirit that is an agent of harm, distress or ruin

Divine
Supremely good or heavenly

Ectoplasm
A substance or vapor that produces spirit materialization

Elf
A small mischievous or malicious creature

Emanation

1. Something that is emitted or flows out of a source
2. The origination of the world by a series of hierarchically descending radiations from the Almighty through immediate stages to matter